Ivory Lives, Face Condoms, The Drippy Peacocks, Seeking Investors for a Progressive Minded Company
“The reasonable man adapts himself to the world: the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man.”
— George Bernard Shaw
Sunday morning, how are you? I’m fine, thank you for asking; it’s a little chilly out; I see you brought your tunic and sash. You can rest your sitzfleisch over there and grab a cup of joe; I’m feeling a little spicey today.
A lot is going on these days, riots in most major cities; it seems porcelain lives might matter? According to a jury of his peers, a young ivory man was found not guilty of murdering three porcelain guys in self-defense. A lot of people are claiming our system is broken. They try and bring up skin tone, and for some reason, he was racist. It’s an interesting take on the event. The media are invested in a particular narrative, but I think most sensible people understand the story. Spin it, baby, but you can’t flip the script.
If you want to protest, protest kid killing. Did you know more children have been shot in Chicago than killed by COVID in the entire country? According to the CDC, CDC reported that 214 children 17-years old or younger had been killed by COVID-19 nationwide so far this year — compared to 261 Chicago kids who have been victims of gunfire in Chicago, according to police statistics reported by Fox News. Interestingly, I used Fox, a right-leaning news source, and the CDC, a left-leaning entity. That should satisfy both sides. Maybe we should mask the guns?
I saw a tweet yesterday that Andreson Cooper averages 250,000 viewers for his show. Comparatively, Joe Rogan has 11,000,000 views for his podcasts. Who is more trusted? AC or Joe? If you are honest, more people trust the obese comedian commentator over the silvered hair handsome man. Joe cuts through the bullshit and has long-form interviews. He believes in radical ideas like biological men should not compete in women’s sports. Obviously, Joe is a bigot.
Kid Rock dropped a new song yesterday; you might want to check it out. It’s a little bit of a punch to the snowflakes out there, it’s got a funky beat, and you can dance to it. Joe Rogan and Theo Vaugh were sharing their visits to Bob’s house. He built a replica of the white house, it’s 21000 feet with two bedrooms, and the rest is “party.” He had a church on site that had a couple of stables for his horses. It sounds like Graceland. Oh, the song is titled “Nobody going to tell me how to live.”
You do you, and I’ll do me, and forever both can be free. I think that might be one of our issues these days, people trying to tell others what to do and how to live their life. In the ’60s, the hippy movement was all about the freedom of the individual. This generation seems to want to focus on the rights of the collective. If you have more than 100 people, you have to do this. If you are less than six feet from he, her, they, or iz, you must cover-up.
My body, my choice, your body, your choice, can you feel me? I don’t think I need to wear a warmer coat, so the person beside me does not get cold. The northern states are getting pounded by COVID, but most are vaccinated. Does the vaccine work? I think it does; if you are vaxed, you probably won’t die. There is a new pill coming out that, if you take it, it’s 90 percent effective in treating the virus. I think it is time to move on, end the mandates and restrictions, and get back to a country of folks who are not scared of droplets. The real pandemic is the loss of understanding and compassion for all ideals and views.
I no longer enjoy flying; I used to; it was a fun thing to do, but now, when I enter an airport, I must have a face condom or get scolded until I apply said face condom. I’m not too fond of condoms. Are you a condom fan? Oh, I need to share a message. The condoms that our firm passed out this last year are now expired. So if you are using The Thompson Group condoms, do so at your own risk. We are working with our vendors to procure more condoms; it might be best to discard the purple ones.
I made Death Wish coffee with Liquid Death water, and let me tell you; I might have discovered a new morning cocktail. But, my God, the best coffee in the world mixed with the most incredible water in the world, give it a try; it’s a little over the top, but damn, it is delicious. So, we ordered a few cases of Liquid Death from Amazon, still and sparkling; if you visit our house, that is what you will be offered, cold and crisp water from the alps. It reminds me of home.
I’m in a band, the name of the band is the Drippy Peacocks, we are working on writing songs, working on a logo, hiring a mascot, it’s a lot of work starting a band. We wrote our first two songs yesterday, Dick No More and Sheila. Dick no more tells the tale of the passing of Richard, and Sheila is about a tequila-drinking horse. Record labels are pounding at the door, but we will private label our stuff; we think it will give us greater control. I’ve got a company designing our merch, t-shirts, posters, hats; we will release our tour dates soon; catch us at your local theater. If you like cowbell, you will love the Drippy Peacocks.
I have a business idea if you want to steal it. I think most dogs in their past life had an issue with cardboard. Maybe you have a dog, and you know this is a thing. I’m thinking of starting a company that makes dog toys out of cardboard; I believe it is a trillion-dollar idea. I would recycle the boxes and put them in the shape of animals and food. Can you share my vision? I’m seeking first-round investors if you have some extra scratch.
Today I will identify as natural color, and my pronouns will be “whiff” and “waff.” I am seeking only progressive-minded people to fund my new venture; we will be environmentally friendly and donate proceeds to organizations that help greater marginalize the abilities of ivory, sand, light sand, and porcelain. We will run like the government with no respect for our balance sheet, income statement, or cash flow statement. We will have rules for thee, but not for we; this is going to be GREAT!
“The reasonable man adapts himself to the world: the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man.”
— George Bernard Shaw
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